If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn’t want you, nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that’s not meant to be. Slower is better. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can’t “be friends”. A friend wouldn’t mistreat a friend.
Don’t settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. Don’t stay because you think “it will get better.” You’ll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better. The only person you can control in a relationship is you. Avoid men who have a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn’t marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently? Always have your own set of friends separate from his. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up. Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.
You cannot change a man’s behavior. Change comes from within. Don’t EVER make him feel he is more important than you are. Even if he has has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.
Never let a man define who you are. Never borrow someone else’s man. If he cheated with you, he’ll cheat on you. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you. All men are NOT dogs.
You should not be the one doing all the bending… Compromise is two way street. You need time to heal between relationships. There is nothing cute about baggage… Deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship. You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you. A relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals. Look for someone complimentary…not supplementary.
Dating is fun… Even if he doesn’t turn out to be Mr. Right. Make him miss you sometimes… When a man always know where you are, and you’re always readily available to him ~ he takes it for granted. Never move into his mother’s house. Never co-sign for a man. Don’t fully commit to a man who doesn’t give you everything that you need. Keep him in your radar but get to know others.
Scared of being alone is what makes a lot of women stay in relationships that are abusive or hurtful: Dr. Phil says… You should know that: You’re the best thing that could ever happen to anyone and if a man mistreats you, he’ll miss out on a good thing. If he was attracted to you in the 1st place, just know that he’s not the only one. They’re all watching you, so you have a lot of choices. Make the right one. Ladies take care of your own hearts…
If you think a woman in a tan vinyl bra and underwear, grabbing her crotch and grinding up on a dance partner is raunchy, trashy, and offensive but you don’t think her dance partner is raunchy, trashy, or offensive as he sings a song about “blurred” lines of consent and propagating rape culture, then you may want to reevaluate your acceptance of double standards and your belief in stereotypes about how men vs. women “should” and are “allowed” to behave.
Thank you Dr. Jill for putting it so clearly. The broo ha ha is nothing more than our own insecurities and embarrassment manifesting itself along blurred acceptance of right and wrong, men and women relations and personal standards.
As an entertainer and producer I am very aware that it takes a variety of ideas and creative thinking to produce anything. The first rule of thumb that any producer ask himself is ..”who is my target audience”? When that question is answered then it makes it easier to produce your event.
The 2013 MTV awards is an annual event that is primarily a business generating, money-making event for MTV and its affiliates. The TARGET audience that makes up the MTV generation is the youth aged from 12-24 years. Remember that MTV is a cable and satellite television channel that broadcasts popular music and promotional music videos. It was launched in 1981. So one would ask why should they be concerned with anything that might be considered ‘old’ or out of their target audience current trends? Some will say their target audience is the youthful, try anything, do anything, wear my pants on my ass, tattoo covered ,a piercing body, colored hair, booty and cuchie showing generation . MTV is giving that audience the staple they have given them all year – filth. Whatever you feed the people little by little , they become. For those MTV generation who knows better, they might be appalled, like Will Smith kids reaction to the performances. But for others it is ..”yea…This is THE BOMB”… sadly expressing their delight at the gourmet of pop culture gone south.
Will Smith & Kids at MTV last night looks like they saw a ghost!
Every year MTV gives its audience , totaling millions worldwide, “Shock & Awe”. It doesn’t matter about the clever editing used, filth usually filters through. This year the show was held in Brooklyn. Why Not? It’s the coolest place since Vegas. A whole NBA Team moved there! Nicely tucked between Brooklyn Bridge, the Barclay Center was the home for the filth that started from the so-called must have staple of awards show the Red Carpet! The only thing exciting about that “carpet” show was the shot above from the overhead blimp. That experience was just a lot of howling screaming kids and the shallowest ‘personalities’ that they could find to interview .
Lady Gaga’s opening
Lady Gaga opened the show. She has a new single so it’s a done deal. In the usual Lady Gaga shock and awe style she delivered. From audible boos to the eventual hand clapping her reaction was at best luke warm. This audience was tough if they can’t appreciate Gaga.
The next shock was the duo featuring the current “thief of rhythm” Robin Thicke and the media popular Mylie Cyrus. That performance made Janet Jackson’s “NIPPLEGATE” looks like a sunday school performance. Everyone’s talking about it. umm WHY? The hypocrisy is killing me. Everybody ‘twerks’ in the MTV generation. It’s a standard acceptable “dance style ” for the ‘ladies’ and Mylie is only doing what she knows the kids love to do. So don’t blame Mylie. It’s on MTV DAILY!
Mylie Cyrus “twerking” at MTV awards
The show moved from the MTV awards to the Justin Timberlake concert , complete with a reunion of NSYNC, how touching. He was receiving the coveted Michael Jackson Award. His performance was actually a competition between his dancers and Gaga’s dancers to see who were the best performers and whose choreography was outstanding The same boring , overly produced pop numbers for 20 minutes from someone who is at best a mild performer. All I expected to see was Mrs. Carter appear and shake her “boo-die” that only Mrs Carter can. At that point I went to bed.
Justin Timberlake & NSYNC on stage
Some 2 hours later I awoke and the show was airing again from 10.30pm – 12. I decided to watch the balance as I had recouped some strength to endure the MTV filth. The usual staple , Kanye aka “Father of cute little North West “ performed. Somehow his contract with MTV is indefinite and as usual he lost me for the 3 minutes he was on stage. As a matter of fact – he lost the entire audience and only Kanye knows his message he wanted to spread last night. Thankfully he did not slap anyone for their awards.
Kanye West performs
The filth continued. Drake looking like a child high on coke to the over exposed Kevin Hart . But the most humorous segment of the night was the producer’s ode to ‘equality’ with the appearance of out and about athlete Jason Collins and the current & popular ASAP Rocky to deliver the message of inclusion to the audience. I must admit that was good comic relief in an otherwise boring show. On stage were 2 peas, not in the same pod, delivering a message that one pea LIVES and the other FORCED to ‘promote’ a topic that was clearly not good for his reputation and his die-hard fans, you know, the boys from Compton or South Chicago or Harlem. Those boys that will slap anyone who just glance over at them. Poor ASAP Rocky, didn’t know what to say or how to say it, he just blurted out what comes to him naturally….
“A$AP Ferg’s Trap Lord album is in stores right now!” said Rocky. “The next artist stands up for everybody being equal—color, homosexuality” he added, pointing to Collins….”
Mr. Producer…next time give the guy a script for christ sake. Don’t leave him out to the wolves. Poor guy has to live with that reputation for life . SMH…the cost of money and promotion.
ASAP Rocky and Jason Collins 2 peas not in the same pod
There were some saving graces however and from the audience reaction they too appreciated class Bruno Mars, probably the best performer of the night, Macklemore performing ‘Same Love” and Jennifer Hudson joined Mary Lambert on the same song. There were flashes of brilliance but in the environment of filth it got lost from the stench of MTV’s presentation of modern-day pop culture. The show ended thank God with Kate Perry performing the hit from the latest soundtrack from the new Rocky movie “Roar”. At that point my stomach was the only thing roaring for food, food .
Pop culture is in trouble. Last night was a reflection of the social change in the society, albeit MTV being American pop culture. Sadly it filters through out the world and our kids believe that this is quality. As parents you can only do so much. Hopefully you will not loose them to the abyss of the MTV generation dark hole. But last night it was all about marketing, supply and demand and consumerism. Thankfully for me the remote was my little friend. I am saved. But the thought that your kids will grow up in a world where pop culture no longer craves the angels of music but rather the demons, vampires and the dead, it is enough to make you call up your subscriber and say …remove MTV from my subscription.
Macklemore. Jennifer Hudson & Mary Lambert performing ‘Same Love.”
Most of us exist in this space called Earth. We know we were born . We celebrate the day as our ‘birthday’ and we evolve over time , every year doing the same thing. But if you ask some people WHY they are born, they might probably give you a generic answer..’I was born to have a family and kids and have a good life…” Thats it .
To the average man that is enough. But I challenge you to think that we are all here for a specific reason. Every one of the billion persons in humanity is here for a reason. When you find that reason, that is the day you will understand WHY you are here. Some take a lifetime while others discover over a shorter period. Regardless of time- strength to you if you discovered your truth. Hope for those who haven’t.
“AKWANTU” is the documentary of a special set of Jamaicans whose triumphs have been drowned in the noise of history. The story tells of the historic victory of a set of slaves ,at the time less than 50, over the mighty British Army in Jamaica to gain their freedom. They were called the Maroons.
A British governor signed a treaty promising them 2,500 acres in two locations, because they presented a threat to the British.
Beginning in the late 17th century, Jamaican Maroons fought British colonists to a draw and eventually signed treaties in the 18th century that effectively freed them over 50 years before the abolition of the slave trade in 1807.
To this day, the Jamaican Maroons are to a significant extent autonomous and separate from Jamaican society. The physical isolation used to their advantage by their ancestors has today led to their communities remaining among the most inaccessible on the island. In their largest town, Accompong, in the parish of St. Elizabeth, the Leeward Maroons still possess a vibrant community of about 600. Tours of the village are offered to foreigners and a large festival is put on every January 6 to commemorate the signing of the peace treaty with the British after the First Maroon War.
It is a fascinating story of the Jamaican Maroons and their victory. They could only accomplish this through UNITY -nothing else. Its a pity we have not learned anything from history except that where there is no unity there is no strength.
We will keep you posted on this story but for now educate yourself on this historic group of people- the Maroons of Jamaica.
Its Friday all and the beginning of the weekend. Don’t know your plans however whatever they are make sure its fun, its full of love and its safe. Here’ some weekend tid bits for you to chew on till next week.
Ok so there is a bru ha ha going on between Robin Thicke’s camp and the estate of Marvin Kaye’s camp claiming Thicke plagiarized the music of Marvin in Thicke’s new hit ‘Blurred Lines:. Got to tell you I listened to both music and well lets just say someone was in the room when Marvin was recording his song. But you be the judge. The video above is Marvin and the one below is Thicke. hmmm any similarities?
Ben Affleck to be casted as Batman in the new Superman sequel
hmmm now lets figure this one out…so he is riding a hollywood high from his recent Academy wins..check. He is by Hollywood’s standards a box office pull for teens…check…so by Hollywood’s standards he is the money guy..check. Ah well, Batman has always been a boring, monochromatic, dull, stiff, kind of character to which Ben fits the bill perfectly so yup, I agree with the producers…Dull meets Dull. what do you think?
Steroids, Drugs and Rock & Roll
Great title but in the world of sports a tornado is brewing. Seems its was confirmed that Tyson Gay was positive in his drug bust. Powell, Simpson et al are also awaiting their fate at the labs. not only that, the past director of Jamaica’s JADA spew out venom this week over Jamaica’s lack of testing their athletes. This is beginning to be the story of the year. Lets watch this one and see where the wind takes us. What tangled web we weave?
And the final post it note is one that is poignant for the weekend. Its a documentary about the tragedy 3 families have to endure due to careless texting and driving accidents. Not much need to be said except..please Don’t Tex and Drive..it CAN wait. believe me IT CAN.
Have a great weekend all.
BEAUTY IN THE EYES OF BEHOLDER
A journalist from the esteemed newspaper the Daily Gleaner in Jamaica wrote an article on sprint coach Francis ( coach of Asafa Powell and Shelly Ann Fraser amongst others) and he intimated that coach Francis is not ‘beautiful’ in a manner of speaking but according to him and I quote…”
Let’s ignore what he’s not. He’s not in the modelling business. Nor is he interested in vying for the Debonair of the Year award. Children, we don’t have to like Stephen Francis. But for what he has done in building Jamaicans who’ve brought glory to this land, he demands nothing short of our respect.”
I have a problem with this article. On the one hand you are praising him for the work he is doing and on the other you are drawing reference that he is not a “pretty man.”
My question to you Mr. Writer is …who is a “pretty man?” Are you are pretty man? What standards are you using for “pretty”? Is it your own backward concept or the one that you accepted from society’s corrupted interpretation .
Drawing reference to the looks of anyone as a basis for an argument suddenly makes that argument lame and stupid. Everything has beauty, not everyone sees it. I am sure Mr Francis cleans up very well and in the eyes of his family he is the most beautiful father, husband or even grandfather. Your opinion of his beauty is really not important so making reference in the article is either disrespecting him from your own callous mentality or disrespecting us the reader.
I assume you are an educated man but certainly not an intelligent one. Whilst we agree that coach Francis deserves all the accolades for the success your reference is pathetic to say the least. If you cannot add effectively to the silence then please shut up.
What do you think? Did I miss the journalist point of view?
So here we are , facing a mystery by human standards and some people are already calling him ‘alien.” People are so….umm…’complicated.’ We do not like or accept anything that is different from the so called ‘norm.” Instead of learning what we can to further understand this phenomenon we categorize him, put a label on him like he were canned food.
Whatever reason this kid was born into this world we will never know. This gift of his is special and we ought to embrace his difference so that in time we can help him help us. He is no “alien”, no ‘cat” and certainly no ‘freak.’ The world is filled with ignorant people who sadly like to open their mouths to confirm their stupidity.
TEN THINGS YOU DID NOT KNOW ABOUT BOB MARLEY
These may make you go…hmmm I didn’t know that. Well for me i was surprised in a few of the information. One thing’s for certain- Bob in his latter years became almost prophetic in his words, his lyrics only to be manifested as truth after his death. Good read. Hope you enjoy it as much I did.